Personal Statement Essay by Merline Simplice
A personal statement supports the application to study at a university or college. It's a chance for students to articulate why they'd like to study a particular course or subject, and what skills and experience they possess that show their passion for their chosen field. Below is Merline’s third draft of her personal statement. Each summer, our fellowship attends a 3-day writing bootcamp to revise and craft their stories. We are excited to share that Merline is now attending the University of Florida on a full-ride scholarship.
Common App Questions #5: Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.
It was still and eerily quiet. In the cold-tiled waiting room, the clock’s hypnotic ticking pierced my ears. The aroma of coffee hung in the air along with the sounds of keys clacking noisily as the nurses roamed the halls. I stared at my lap, twisting and playing with my fingers, hoping to control my anxiety and maintain a semblance of tranquility for my family.
The night before, my family was awakened by loud screams from my five year-old sister. Her sobs, triggered by a pulsating headache, echoed throughout the house. Petrified by her wailing and uncontrollable nausea, my parents called 911.
I remember sitting in the waiting room scrutinizing the clock’s second hand, while around me other families also struggled to hide their own fears. After multiple examinations and discussions about her MRI, the doctors discovered a tumor in my sister’s brain; one which they quickly realized required immediate surgery. Almost two hours later, Dr. Jasmine, a surgeon clad in light blue scrubs, locked eyes with me and walked toward us. With each step, I could feel my heart pound harder and faster. In a soothing voice and with a genuine smile, she announced, “The surgery was successful; she is well.” I could feel a burning relief flood my body, and my stress began to melt. It was only after Dr. Jasmine's comforting reassurances that the gravity of the emergency hit me; this is real.
Had my sister been taken to a different hospital, my family would have never encountered Dr. Jasmine. Her ability to simultaneously inform and calm my frightened family made her appear ten feet tall. Both the depth of her knowledge and her authoritative demeanor confirmed my existing passion to pursue a career in medicine.
I strive to become an accomplished, compassionate, and reputable pediatric neurologist. By combining my wisdom, training, meticulous work ethic, and excellent interpersonal skills, I aim to fulfill my vision as a sought-after expert in my field, into reality.
I knew from the get-go it wouldn't be easy and that I would need to earn excellent grades to be admitted to a medical school, so I doubled my commitment to my studies. I wanted to challenge my thinking and further improve my problem-solving and time-management skills and enrolled in rigorous academic classes.
Interestingly, I used my problem-solving abilities during my sister’s recovery. Being the daughter of immigrants has been a surprising advantage in interpersonal skills, confidence skills, and leadership skills, which has allowed me to deal with the language barriers between my family and the medical world. As the most proficient English speaker in my Haitian home, my parents relied on me to interact with an army of doctors and insurance agents, a role which led to the rapid development of my communication skills. As I became more accustomed to delivering unsettling updates to my parents, my evolving confidence began to surprise me.
From my numerous volunteer experiences working with children at my former elementary school to volunteering at Bethesda Hospital aiding visitors at the information desk, I learned how to prioritize tasks while also managing others’ expectations.
While visualizing myself as a practicing pediatrician, I realized healers hear a silent call, one that inspires them to care for people who have medical issues. With Dr. Jasmine as my role model, I know I want to treat children with neurological disorders. It took only three words, “ She is well,” for me to realize the blessings that accompany working and caring for children, and to understand the magnitude of that calling. That afternoon, while watching Dr. Jasmine convey important information at the same time she relieved my parents’ anxieties, I saw my future self in my sister’s doctor. It will be a privilege to one day treat, and hopefully heal, my young patients and connect with their families the same way Dr. Jasmine connected with my family.